Day 288 of 366 Blog Challenge 2012
It’s official folks, my love affair with chickens has ended! Most of you will already know about my fascination with chooks … fowls … hens … call them what you may, but after my dealings with the three recaltricent hens at the caravan park today, I’m about done with them.
Folks, these three hens have over-stepped the boundaries of friendships this morning.
Since I last wrote, they have taken up squatters residence here at the park and they refuse to go home. I know this because I heard Brenda call out in her husky voice: “These bloody hens, they have started staying here all night and never go home anymore!”
In fact, they take the term “free range chicken” too far for my liking. They live two doors up and used to go home to roost every afternoon, but we noticed that all this changed yesterday. Yes, Brenda was right, they stayed the night! And more to the point, they appeared at our door early this morning when we got up to get ready for church.
Next minute, the three recaltricent hens were standing huddled together in our van about to take up residence there. They also take another term: “free to roam” far too literally when they put their feet in our caravan folks!
“What next?” I wondered aloud as I chased them out of the van in a voice that was a trifle loud for a caravan park. Mind you, I needn’t have worried as anyone who matters here, seems to get up at the crack of dawn to do whatever it is they do … not work that’s for sure.
It’s usually to go fishing I suspect or in the case of Brenda she has a following of bush turkeys, pigeons and ibis’ who are waiting for hand-outs and have no idea how to find food for themselves anymore. Therefore, she needs to be up early to act as the Pied Piper of feathered creatures. And of course, the three recaltricent hens would have been waiting there also. No wonder they don’t want to go home.
It’s a good life for a chicken in this caravan park … or any other feathered friend also. Now, when we came home from church we were having a late breakfast at our table – situated underneath a tree near our van – when the three hens were milling around and being quite obnoxious. However, far worse was yet to come when we sat down to eat.
The eggs were fried but the yolks were runny and looked delicious sitting on the toast. Geoff was about to cut off a piece when one of the hens jumped up on the table and headed for the egg with her beak. But fearless Geoff was too fast for this particular recaltricent chicken and managed to stop it ‘mid beak’ from destroying his egg! Phew …
Now tell me folks, is this cannibalism? You know, when a chicken eats its own creatures’ eggs? They obviously have no conscience about these things. Despite our efforts to chase them, we were unsuccessful which just proves my point: having three recaltricent hens around you in such close quarters is proving to be unbearable.
Therefore, here is the course of action I have decided to take:
FOR SALE: 3 RECALTRICENT HENS, Rhode Island reds, plump and ready for the table and as an extra, I will throw in a few bush turkeys, 3 ibis and some bush pigeons for free. I’m not sure how the turkeys will taste but I think the pigeons would make a mighty good pie. The ibis could just strut around your yard and look ethereal.
So folks, if you are looking for some fine-looking chickens, come down to the Cabarita Caravan Park and pick up three recaltricent hens … going cheap in order to save our sanity … PLEASE?